I ve got a situation with my fiance
heis driving mad !!!!!!!!!offffffffffff
he called me yesterday saying that he want to be alone for couple of days so he will turn his cell off for days and he went far to the west staying in his friend 's house alone he says he doesnt want see or talk to anyone
even me
OMG!
could this happen!!!!!!!
the one u love u avoid to talk to him
this is not logic
why me ok he can be in a bad situation and refuses to see anyone one but not me Im not like the otherts im his love if he still considers me that
if the same happend to me i always want see only him and i want run to him and be only with him not to avoid him as he is doing now
i asked him if it was me who caused him that dissappontemnt he said no it'snt my fault so why he does that to me
why treats me like the other avoding me
that's not logic i concluded that he doesnt love me the way he should
lately he has been so different and talked with me harshly he evn hurt me with some words he has some troubles with his project lately he said that he is having a bad time ok i understand that and he knows that im ready to do anything for him i stand with him and support him when something happend he used to come to me saying that he wants to be only with me he wants to forget and i did my best to make him forget and help him
but this time he's been so different he is changed even in his speech he takls completly differnt as if im talking to some one else he says shi*ts no sens speech he even hurt me sometimes and he stopped saying he loves me which was our "daily must" say to each other and he is not telling me how does he feels he even not asking me to meet that he used to do anything possible to come and see me
he even is not appreciating what i do for him he knows well how important he is to me and how much i love him
he knows that i m ready to do aything for him
i hate that when he doesnt involve me in his matters and he doesnt need me that so cruel OMG!!!
ur story just reminds me of mine.let me tell u mine then comment on urs.
my boyfriend was the same as urs.I was his life,meant everything to him.he was always ready to give and do anything to make me happy.I felt the same too.so that we were almst goin to get married.
but the only problem I faced with him.was that he couldn't control his anger that much.so that,whenever he was angry or upset,or had any types of problems.he always prefered not to speak at all.not to say anything stupid.
once,his best friend died.so he just told me that and disappeared.I swear he did for 2 days.can u imagine how stupid was that???I kept leavin him messages.askin everyone about him.I was goin to die.but he finally appeared and said he needed sometime by his own.
andd when i asked him why didn't u tell me before disappearin.he said he was in bad mood and didn't want to say anything that could hurt me.and once he started to get over his problems.he was back to normal.
so,here's my comment:I don't think he's selfish nor stopped lovin u.he's probably under huge stress.
when he asks from u to stay away,it's becoz in his mind,it's best for u.he's afraid to say anythin that may hurt u as he already did before.
so my own opinion,give him this space,I know it's very very hard.but believe me it's better for both of u.wait till he's the one who calls u.but in order to show him how much u still want to help,send him messages from time to time.
and once all his problems are over.he'll be the same u used to know.
good luck and try to give me news =) he is obviously going through something difficult. some people need to be alone to reflect on and deal with the issue. its hard to think clearly with other people around, even the person that is closest to you. he has a different personality then you, you might not deal with the issue like he is doing but that doesn't mean he doesn't love you just as much. He may yet need you in the near future but for now i suggest you not get mad at him and forgive him for any remarks he may have made. everyone needs their space. All you can do is be supportive and listen. you can't control him, just be there for him if he needs you. he will probably feel even worse if you give him a hard time about it. I don't think that will be good on the relationship. MEN!
they can be obnoxious!
Now, that is not right to ask me
going alone for DAYS, closing his phone, there is something fishy even if it was not!
he is your fiance, and you have the right!
marriage or engagement is to rely on the other, and not run away
do your math, is he the one for you? forget about love, forget about your heart, THINK
can you live with him , can you live with all the wrong words and the abuse?
Thats how u will get you answer
that's how i got my answer, and broke up!
Hope i find a new one soon though LOOOOOOOOOOOL
EDIT: Look, you have your right to be angry, he has no blue tent above his head and he is not perfect
turning off his phone, and not contacting you is a big deal!
try asking his friends, try asking his mom, or ask him to his face, if he is living abroad, be sure there is no one else, be sure he really has problems, but DONT tell him what u r thinking until u r sure
LOVE comes and goes, and he doesn't need to tell you he loves u daily. you MUST know it yourself.
If he really has problems, show him you are with him, but what he did HURT you.
TELL HIM. BE HONEST. that's when you know you have a true relationship pls dont b upset. i think he has some problem,that he dont want to share with any one,if he want to go to his friends house dont stop him, and try to find what is wrong with him, dont give him pressure to b in contact with u.everything will b all rite after few days. you see man are passive if they have problems they just simply go away and try to figure things out unlike girls when girls have problem they want someone to talk to .....
give him a chance trust him Don't ever think you are alone or lost.
All your dreams will come true and my prayers are always with you. What if you are married.. what he will do leave for couple days too? I suspect he have another cell phone he use and the one u have is turned off. He remind me of my ex fiances. ex. Cleo..I'm not going to try to tell you what is right or what is wrong . All I can say is that sometimes we make decisions that look to be right at the time but with hindsight turn out to be so dreadfully wrong !
This situation of yours may have a perfectly innocent explanation ....I sincerely hope it has ! If not ... if there is something that has the potential to cause you a lot of grief in the future , it is better that you deal with it now than later !
I would wait until you are able to have a proper conversation with him & then calmly & lovingly say that you have been hurt by the way he has treated you & need to know what the problem is . Depending on what his response is then you will know what to do..Cleo, try not to be emotional because you need to keep calm & be able to process what he says.
You know where we are if you need any other help... Something is definitely up with this guy cleo, especially if he doesn't want to talk at all. I don't want to speculate on what he's thinking, and I certainly don't know anything about marriage customs in Algeria, but here in North America you don't do things like that. If my wife or fiance did that to me, I would be rethinking my future with that person.
Sorry, probably not the answer you wanted to hear.
Good Luck Sweetie!! hmmm.. well to me hun this sounds so wrong.. and honestly I would not let it happen. In my opinion this is not normal and I would be very worried that this involves another woman.. If I were you I would say to him I am you wife/fiance and we are one person you cannot shut me off or out I understand your having a hard time just as we all do but I want to be there for you and I will not accept you shutting your phone off for this period of time.. Really every woman needs to know a man will push as much as he can even if he is the most perfect guy the woman has to stand up at some point and say NO i will not accept it :) Hope it all works out for your cleo your such a sweet person :) he may be involved in something he is trying to keep you out of for your protection. don't give up on him yet. we men are not selfish its only you ladies can't quiet understand us.
You see your partner seems to have a problem that he doesn't want you to get involved with.
We men sometimes do that, we need the space to settle our own mess.Coz you girls tend to aks lots of annoying questions and it will interupt with our thinking mind. Just be cool and let him finish his thing. he'll come back for you coz like you said he loves you right!
just give him the support that he needs and tell him to takecare of himself.its ok if he misses the 'i love you' for a day or two coz he got alo0t of things in his mind right now.
please try to understand even when you don,t. this is the life that you have to face when you say till death do us part.
and do have confidence in him i know he loves you very much.
good luck and don't worry too much k
see ya! hope everything goes ok with both of you'll. it is said in islam... doubt not, make certain.
give him a chance to be alone, even if he's into some mischief, showing your stability will earn your respect and he will pick you from the others. But keep on worrying and nagging him would drive him more away from you. Just be firm for your true devotion on him.
Allah knows best. Be firm on the path of islam. This man .. doesn't deserve sweet girl like you........ At least if he had some problems...... he can call you and tell you that he had problems and he needs some time alone....... and this some time must be short.........
To be honest with you......... it seems he is not a good guy to marry ......... or to continue living with........ but let's give him another chance...... only one last chance........
And beware of giving love too much without taking any ........ don't be so kind with anyone who doesn't appreciate it......... | 