I need-o help-o now-o?

i was trying to cross the border, but the border patrol caught me, what should i do? i really want to go into the US.....

you should run out in front of a tractor trailer thats doing about 100 mph...that should help

kill the patrol.

You will get here. Eventually you will make it. Keep trying. See you when you get here.

apply for a visa and do it the legal way (pretending that you're legitimately asking this question)

Or you could stay in your own country! How about that?!

Oh, and I think the tractor trailer idea might work pretty well too, so definitely give that a try before you give up.

Become a comedian.

ummmmmm yeah, stay in your country, we don't need anymore people standing in front of home depot.

go back home. try doing it the legal way next time.
you are so fortunate i didn't catch you.